so broken are the strong ones
by particularly good finder
Summary: "Quiet, Finn. It's okay. Just please stop crying. Don't cry for me anymore. Just…stop. I'm strong."


**So, this just came out of nowhere. BAM! And yeah... I experimented with a different-ish style of writing. Don't know if I like it or not. But please, enjoy!**

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**_so broken are the strong ones_**

:-:

_take me where I cannot stand. I don't care, I'm still free  
_**you can't take the sky from me**

:-:

Kurt knows he won't be able to save himself this time. Finn is in detention on the other side of the school, Puck is at work, and Matt and Mike are nowhere to be seen. The mob of teenage boys draws in closer, and Kurt knows his jacket won't be the only thing destroyed.

They start with his clothes, _the bastards_, ripping them and laughing, pushing his small body back and forth. He tries to break through their circle, but a rough hand sends him to the ground, and the pain begins.

A foot collides with his face, another with his ribs. Fists pummel his chest, his jaw, his entirety, until his vision is spotty and his head feels empty and his body is warm and wet and _dear god, the pain, make it go away, please…_

His limp body is shoved against the cool metal of the lockers, and a maniacal laughter resounds through the hallway. Kurt blacks out, grateful for the moment of peace.

_Oh, God! All that blood! Wake up, Kurt! Wake up! _Kurt is floating. His legs are useless, but he is flying, away from the bigotry and pain and towards the dark comfort of nothingness. He sees the sky, the beautiful night sky covered with a splattering of stars and then he sees _her_.

_Stay with me, Kurt, stay with me. _It's Tina, isn't it? He knows her voice, but he doesn't want to stay with her. Not when his mother is floating in the distance, coming closer by the second.

_Kurt, please…_ Katherine Hummel holds out her hand, smiling her sweet, sad smile as her brown hair floats around her face in waves. Kurt reaches out to his mother, crying.

_Kurt, the ambulance is here. Just hold on, please. I've called Finn, he's meeting us there. Please, hold on…for him._

But Kurt is floating. The sky is so beautiful and his mother is beautiful and God, I want to stay here forever. Tina's voice is getting softer, and Kurt is flying away.

_Please. Kurt…please._

:-:

_it's easier to believe in this sweet madness  
_**oh, this glorious sadness, it brings me to my knees**

:-:

Finn can't think. His mind is a whirlwind of worry and pain and _dear God_, _here comes the doctor. _His hands sweat, his lips tremble, and _oh, no, the doctor looks sad_.

He doesn't realize he's hyperventilating until his mother asks if he needs to sit down, and he just shakes his head and says _no, I need to hear this_. Burt approaches the doctor, talking in hushed tones so even Finn, who _desperately_ needs to know what's going on, can't hear a peep. When the doctor leaves, Finn starts to hyperventilate again because _oh, no, oh, no, oh, no, Mr. Hummel's crying. _

Finn's knees shake violently as Burt relays the doctor's message that _Kurt is alive, but really hurt and oh my god, my son, my only son…_

Finn's knees finally give out, and he awkwardly collapses onto the ground, landing on his ass like a small child. His mom doesn't really seem to notice because Burt is sobbing, so Finn just stares blankly at the doctor's retreating backside, trying to calm his breathing.

An hour passes, and Finn and his mom are alone in the waiting room. Mr. Hummel was allowed in to see Kurt, and hasn't returned since. The football player shifts restlessly in his chair, and his mom announces she's going to search for coffee. By the look in her eyes, Finn knows she just wants to go cry without scaring her son, and he is grateful for it.

Another minute passes and Finn can't take it anymore. He sees Kurt's doctor and races up to him like his life depends on it and begs _please, please, please can I see him? Is he okay? Please, I'm practically his stepbrother. Please, I need to see him_.

The doctor shows him to Kurt's room, where Mr. Hummel is hunched over the bed, head in his hands. Finn isn't quite sure how his legs haven't given out yet, but he manages to walk to the side of Kurt's bed before he sinks to his knees.

Burt turns to his almost-stepson, eyes shining with tears and starts whispering _Finn, look at him, he's so small, so tiny, my boy, my son, look at him_…

Finn does look at Kurt, and instantly regrets it. The slender boy is beaten and bruised and bloody and Finn is crying. Facades and masks be damned, Finn Hudson is crying and weeping and it's all he can do to not punch a hole in the wall.

The two men crouch by the bed, watching the uneven rise and fall of Kurt's chest as the minutes tick by, both murmuring broken sentences like _so small, so fragile_ and _he's broken. They broke him _and _he'll never be the same. Oh, Kurt…_

Burt can't take it anymore. He rises slowly and leaves without a word, fists clenched so tightly Finn swears he sees blood drip from the man's palms. But Finn can't _leave_. He's found Kurt, found his brother; he can't leave now.

:-:

_Lay your weary head to rest_  
**Don't you cry no more**

:-:

Kurt's eyes open slowly to see the unfocused vision of Finn Hudson crouched by his bedside, hands clasped tightly next to Kurt's elbow. He looked like he was crying, or praying, words reaching Kurt's ears (_so small, he was so strong, he'll be okay, no he won't, no he won't, he won't)._

And suddenly Finn looks up, brown eyes meeting blue (_so blue,_ he hears, _so blue, so sad, so broken_). Kurt's heart shatters as his brother breaks down into sobs, clasping at Kurt's hand with both of his own. The tall boy looks so small as he crumples against the side of the bed, and all Kurt can do is whisper, his voice so hoarse and unrecognizable, _it's okay, it's okay, I'm okay, don't cry. Finn, please, don't cry for me._

Kurt's ribs ache so badly, and he doesn't want to know what his face looks like. The back of his head is screaming with pain and his legs are on fire. But his shoulder – his shoulder feels normal. So he pulls Finn up to sit on the bed, cradling his brother against the one uninjured part of his body, wiping the tears from the boy's face with bandaged hands.

_Shh…calm down, Finn_. Kurt feels like he's a little boy again, trying to stop his father's tears as they watch his mother's casket descend into the ground. Kurt is strong; he's _always_ been strong. And now he has to be strong again, for his father, for his brother. _Quiet, Finn. It's okay. Just please stop crying. Don't cry for me anymore. Just…stop._

:-:

_your promises__, __whispered like prayers  
_**I don't need them**

:-:

But Finn won't stop, can't stop. The tears keep coming, and there is no end in sight. The tall boy curls up next to his brother, crying into his hospital gown, voice cracking as he apologizes and promises _I won't let them hurt you again, they're dead, I swear, I'll kill them, I'll kill them all, I'm so sorry, Kurt, I'm sorry, I should have been there, I hate them, I hate them, oh, Kurt…_

Kurt places a swollen finger over Finn's lips, cutting off his mantra. He doesn't need promises of other people's pain or apologies for something he couldn't stop. He just needs his brother to calm down. He just needs his family to stop hurting.

But Finn doesn't seem to want that. He _wants_ to hurt; Kurt wants to slap him for that, for being so masochistic. _Finn, hush, stop crying, stop threatening those apes. I'm okay. I'm strong. _

And Finn is crying again. _So small, so fragile, so strong, so broken. Oh, Jesus, Kurt, I thought you were dead…_ Kurt sighs, not unkindly, and takes his brother's hand.

_I'm strong. Stronger than you, stronger than Dad. I'm like my mom. Don't cry for me_. Finn nods, trying to swallow back the tears. He stands up, kissing the top of Kurt's head as gently as he can, the calls for the nurse to get his mom and Mr. Hummel. Another nurse comes in to ask the slender boy questions, ask if he needs more pain medicine.

He nods, and she leaves. Finn takes her spot, texting Mercedes and Tina and Artie and Brittany and Quinn and basically the rest of New Directions, who had all been pacing the halls to relieve their worry. Mercedes texts back, announcing they were all in the waiting room, and demands to see Kurt.

But Kurt shakes his head. _Mercedes is strong, but not that strong. I don't want her to see me like this_.

Finn argues, saying that they wouldn't all react like he did, and Kurt just laughs. _I _especially_ didn't want you to see me like this. You just got cocky and barged in._

The taller boy looks sad, and kisses his brother's head again as if to say, _All right. I'll tell her you aren't up for visitors. But she'll barge in sooner or later_.

Kurt's dad comes in, crying again, followed by Mrs. Hudson, who has tears in her eyes as well. Kurt holds their hands and listens to their sobs and _it's okay, it's okay, I'm okay, please Dad, Carole, I'm okay._

Finn rubs his mom's shoulders, holding back the tears Kurt knows are there. He bites his lip, resting his large hands on Carole's shoulders. But he doesn't break apart, not in front of his mom. He knows why Kurt has to be so strong.

Kurt hates to see his hodge-podge family so broken, so hurt. The scene is too much like his mother's funeral, and suddenly he is a little boy again, wiping the tears from his father's eyes. He calms them down, smiling gently._ I'm okay. I'm strong._

His eyes meet Finn's and Finn _understands_. He smiles sadly back at his brother, kissing his mother's head and holding back those tears and _he's strong, Ma. Kurt's tough. He'll be okay._

_He's okay. _


End file.
